Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Building Pain Tolerance - A Follow up

I should cover a couple of quick thoughts here regarding the post that I put up yesterday regarding Pain Tolerance. 


First, one of the pups I respect and hope to get to meet in person one day is bootbrush, and  love following his blog (located at http://bootbrushpup.blogspot.com). He recently posted up his own thoughts on this topic and it was definitely very interesting. You have to check it out.


Also, a little mortified that I keep misspelling tolerance. Gots to quit writing these posts first thing in the morning when I am not fully awake!


I also wanted to say that I am a little concerned that I may have left the wrong impression of totally shitting on those that I referred to as the newer kinks because not everyone practices this form of building that I talked about. My thoughts are broken into these three points:



  1. Still Learning - I am probably the most familiar with the rubber community, primarily because I know some of the guys that have been around for years in it and have heard the history, and I can tell you even in the rubber world things are still evolving. I tend to think of rubber has reaching a level of adolescence on the path to maturity, as opposed to the leather community that is in his more advanced years. The other kinks that are a part of the new kink worlds (like the pups, pigs, furries and gear heads) are in various stages but still early in the development. I am not deriding anyone for not having the traditions but rather calling out that while we tend to rebel against the old guard traditions a bit, there are still things we can learn and take as our own.
  2. Still my favorite - As I said in my post, I identify more with the newer kink worlds rather than the old guard, but I really didn't explain why. I hinted to it back in my post regarding MIR. All the groups that I identified as being the new kinks have one common trait - JOY! The party that I went to at Rubberasylum's there was a great deal of happiness and frolicking good times (and a lot of very cute furry boys and pups). MIR was a joyful event. I compare that to the forays I have done into the old guard groups, and while there are good times to be had, there is always a heaviness to the parties and events. I challenge you to look around at IML (the great mixing pot of kinks) and not tell me that on the  whole the gear heads/rubberboys/pigs/pups are all expressing the fun they are having much more openly than the leather crowd. Not that they aren't having a good time, but they a bit more dour about it. My choice is the more joyful side.
  3. Nothing Wrong with the other - I may have indicated that the approach of going for intensity right away was not for me, but I don't necessarily want to say that it has no place. Creating connection and reaching levels of intensity that take the sub on a journey are not necessarily always needed. I respect the fact that some of the newer boys can take a beating that I am never going to, and be able to take it right out of the gate. I just want to also point out to them there is another approach that is worth exploring as well, and I hope they are finding those connections, those moments of true intensity that bring a boy and Sir to a new place between them. But I must also acknowledge that sometimes, some subs just want to be a prop, and that is ok if everyone is on board with that. 

This is a subject that can go on forever, and I have to think that perhaps I should write from the perspective of a Dom and what they get out of taking someone on this journey. Or perhaps I should do a detailed write up of my next visit with my puppy, since he and I have those connections I am talking about and looking forward to creating a new one very soon. 

One of my favorite parts of exploring these kinks is just how many facets there are. I am looking forward to exploring them all.

1 comment:

  1. WUUFF! (big grin and a tail wag at the nice things Sparky said about this pup! :)) ).

    Obviously you had *yourself* thinking as much as everyone else after that last post!

    I hope none gave yo grief over you last comments - i certainly understood that you were not talking about every player in the 'newer kinks', merely commenting on a particular style of play that you have personally found unsatisfying - and then giving clear reasons as to why that might be.

    i think you are right in naming so many of the 'newer' kinks and players as still learning - and i think it is a beautiful and honest statement to make that whilst we may wish to rebel against the hide-bound rules of the old guard and their traditions, still we should not ignore everything that can be learnt from them. (i'm not sure about this 'them' and 'us' thing anyway - or even where i sit...!)

    i live within multiple Traditions - professional, spiritual and sexual. Tradition can be a way to enshrine the experience of those explorers before us - a way to pass their learning and culture down to us through the ages. IN this way, Tradition is an immense storehouse, and initiation into the Tradition a genuine honour.

    BUT - Tradition can also be binding and restrictive - an excuse for the Conservative minded to create power for themselves by placing blocks and limits on the experience of others.

    Maybe the thing is to learn from the Traditions, to understand their rules and the reason for them being there - and then to break them when we truly understand that they are neither relevant nor helpful. To use the power structures where they are beneficial, and to fight the oppression of those who misuse it...

    because just as much as us younglings need to remember that we did not invent kink, and that we can learn much from our 'elders', so the elders and the Traditions need their rebels and their innovators too. The Traditions give us stability and a structure within which to play - we give them the fluidity and joy that ensures their rules do not become joyless and empty.

    Damn - am i over thinking this?!? ;))

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